That negative inner voice

A negative internal dialogue is something that can contribute to depression. When we feel depressed, our inner voice can reflect that, which unfortunately can be a vicious circle. When you find your inner voice saying things that are hurtful, or mean about yourself, that makes you feel so much worse and adds to the problem.

To change the way you feel about that voice, firstly understand that just because you think it, that doesn't make it true. It's just a thought and as such can be changed. When you find yourself being critical or harsh with yourself, ask yourself if you would speak to, or judge someone you care deeply about in that way? And if there was someone outside of you following you around all the time saying these things, would you accept it in the same way? Chances are you'd tell them where to get off pretty quick! So you don't have to accept it in your head either, and this technique can help...

Imagine that the negative inner voice, for example which tells you "You'll never be happy", has a set of sliding controls, for volume, pitch, distance, location and type. Rate the intensity out of ten of how you feel when you hear that voice, ten being the worst. Then, change the volume, make it come from further away or from a different place, make it squeaky or slow it right down, or change into that of a cartoon character. Repeat the statement in all the different ways above and notice how you feel when you do this. See which makes the most difference to you and keep repeatedly changing any statement or internal dialogue that make you feel worse in this way, and it WILL change the way you feel about it.

The opposite applies to thoughts that make you feel good. When you say positive statements to yourself, turn up the volume, make the inner voice warm and appealing and positively emotive. Make the voice belong to someone you respect or admire and make it compelling for you.